If only

If only I occupied myself with sadness
what of her I could learn, or with
verses that are to be born, or with a
garden…

Maybe that the days would hold some meaning.

Instead I burn time like dry leaves
which keep the fire going –  that
white blindness of the mind

and I am a bird defenseless who misses a
throat to feed itself. 

Yesterday I recognized your soul, Abuelo

I saw you as a young man conquering
my grandmother’s affection, guitar in hand
and all of the promise of this world.   

I finally grasped your essence
which so eluded me while still alive you
lived under the sun, on earth.  

It maybe sometimes it’s necessary
to feel sorry to be a man, but
not human.  

Since already you are beyond:
What necessity is there to
doubt one’s intentions?

Thankful for this dream I
take the chance and cry my
hundred tears in your name

Just like throwing you flowers.

I long to be

I long to be like a bird
and fly over lands
lovingly cultivated

I long to be like an ox
and contemplate the animals
stupid and simple in their pretty world 

I long to be like the night
and listen to your breathing
sweet and soft like vine

I long to be like the wind
and lift up your skirt
as naturally as nature itself…